Running with God

To be able to run has been one of my greatest dreams. I can actually remember dreaming about running. Long, steady strides. Pounding the pavement. And just being able to breathe.

When I was younger, anything cardio induced an asthma attack. This included running, biking up any sort of steep incline, certain calisthenics, swimming. Let me tell you that last one was a real problem. Just imagine yourself having an asthma attack under water...

I usually tried about once a year throughout high school. I would run in the park or just around my neighborhood. I could just get past the first turn or two in the park or around the corner and about halfway down the street before my lungs would protest. I always envied the cross-country people I would see at the park. Mile after mile, especially in the Kentucky heat and humidity. If only I could really run.

Three months ago, I could barely run 1/8 of a mile without gasping for air.

Today, I ran 1.5 miles in the hot sun, against a strong wind, and didn't need my inhaler for the very first time.  As I ran, I prayed, about everything. God bless me with the strength to keep going. Please bring my husband home safely. Help me get past this awful rut I'm in and get through these last days alone. Strengthen my lungs and help me to breathe.  Lord, Bring on the wind.  One foot in front of the other, I ran a mile and half. At my own pace. I broke no world records, and no one on the track took much notice of me. I didn't time it either, because I didn't feel that was important. What was important, was that I did it. Not only did I finish, but I grabbed my keys and kept on running across the street and through the parking lot, all the way to the gym doors.

No one noticed the tears in my eyes as the realization hit me. One of my dreams had actually come true. Through sheer determination, hard work, and a little a lot of extra help from God, I had done it.

I didn't grow up in church. I remember going when I was little but stopping due to sports and traveling around on the weekends. I would go if I spent the night with a friend, but I didn't truly understand His amazingness, until my sophomore year of college. It took some pretty rough times for me to turn to God and ask for help. But pull through them I did. And He has been with me ever since. Helping me to hold myself up when things were rough. Rejoicing with me during some of the best moments of my 22 years. Blessing me with wonderful new friends and introducing me to the most wonderful man I know- my husband. I don't think I would be writing this right now if it wasn't for Him.

The significance of the 1.5 miles is that everyone in the US Air Force has to pass a physical test which includes running 1.5 miles. I joked I would die in basic training because I couldn't run a fraction of it. Now I know that if it came to it, I could do it.

So through my wonderful, amazing, beautiful, merciful, and loving God, I did it. One of my dreams has finally come true. I have finally become a runner.

Oh Poor Mister Georgie

Poor Mister Georgie got neutered today. And micro chipped, and nail trimmed, and vaccinated, and eye-gooped. Since the first few are rather self-explanatory, I'll explain the last. While George was under anesthesia, they noticed irritation in his cornea. So, they added these fluorescent drops and shined a black light on his eye. They found his had a corneal ulcer- in other words, he had a scratch on his, either from getting to happy when he was scratching or just from being brushed in the face and not closing his eye quick enough when he was being rambunctious. Hence, the antibiotic eye-goop. Other than that, everything went very well, and they commented on how very sweet my little boy is.

When I got him home, I left him in his carrier but propped open the door so he could come out on his own terms. He stayed in awhile, asleep. When I went to take out the trash and left the front door, that was enough to tempt the sneaky little bugger halfway out of his cage before he promptly laid back down and just watch, and momentarily, passed back out. A while later, I was standing in the kitchen eating and in walks George- I figured he wanted a little food and water. Nope! He wanted the fly that was buzzing around! The little black terd.... I'm pretty sure he managed to catch it and eat it before he promptly fell back asleep. It's like having a narcoleptic cat. However, I noticed that his back side was wet along with parts of his tail and hind legs. When I checked him, I realized the poor little guy had wet himself while he was asleep in the carrier.

Poor Mister Georgie has had an all-around tough day.

Though its been nice to be able to keep a few window wide open to let the breeze blow right through the house.

Futher updates on Georgie's condition tomorrow after he gets pain meds and dewormer goo- yum!

My Relationship with Skype

My relationship with skype is what you would call a "Love/Hate" relationship. The past few days, it has definitely been hate. Every time I try to talk to my husband, it either won't connect. Or it drops the call. Or he can't hear a single word I have said but I can still hear him. Sometime it takes 10 minutes to send what I've typed in the chat box! Do you see what I mean???

However, today I LOVE skype! I talked/typed to my hubs for a whole 25 minutes before the call dropped! Eee! Pathetic? Sad? that I get excited over such pitiful skyping? Yes, I know. But it was giga-tons better than wbat we've been dealing with this entire week. PLUS I got to chat with two of my best friends back home. And what wonderful chatting it was! First, I go tto talk to both of them at the same time which was pretty dang awesome. Best moment of the three-way call:

Me: laughs in response to something funny

Carrie: Whoa, I've got some funny sounds coming through skype.

Me: Ummm, that was definitely my laugh...

Crazy laughing from all three people can be heard around the globe

I love my besties :) and I do miss them terribly. Even when Carrie had to leave, I had the best conversation with  Sara. My life is just not the same with only talking to her once a week when I lived with her for 2 years. Best part of that conversation? Discussing the pros and cons of getting dressed in a hot, sticky bathroom vs running down the hall naked to get dressed in the bedroom. Bahahaha....only the two of us could have such a conversation.

Oh I miss my dears back in Kentucky...

Blah Days

Do you ever have one of those blah days where all you want to do is sit on the couch and watch movies/tv? Do you randomly start tearing up over tiny little things that make no sense? And you don't really have any motivation to do anything productive like going for a run or getting the mail or buying groceries? And you could really use a gallon of super chocolate fudge ice cream?

Yeah, that would be me today. Gerrit's internet in Florida hated me with a passion this morning and wouldn't let me talk to him. (Thank you Mama for the txt-email format for AT&T numbers) So instead I got 4 lines of txt/email from him. And that would have sufficed on pretty much any other day that wasn't a blah day. And I'm just tired, like physically drained, though somehow I managed a puny semblance of my usual work out. Do I feel like I accomplished anything? Not really. My body just feels like it hates me and is trying to refuse to do anything except feel exhausted.

I must now muster up the effort and gumption to shower, get the mail, find the dental clinic on base before my appt tomorrow, and go buy some groceries. I would probably forgo the last one except I'm out of yogurt, and I'm on this ridiculous yogurt kick at the moment.

Are you sure today is only Tuesday???

Sorry for Slacking

Yes, yes, I am sorry for slacking. But really, you didn't miss a thing. Saturday and Sunday were wonderfully boring. Working out, playing with Georgie, NCIS, and of course, yesterday evening I went I to church. We had a guest chaplain since the one who had been doing the contemporary service PCSed (moved for all you civilians) to Florida last week. I really liked the guest, though. He was very forward with the Father's Day message and tied it in to a lot of different things in a way that really brought the message home. I hope he comes back again soon. Oh, and it was cold all weekend, or at least until about 10pm last night.

Today, I worked out, NCISed it up some more, and then went out to eat with friends. We went to Cambridge to a Bella Italia, which is a chain of, you guessed it, Italian restaurants. The food was great as was the atmosphere. I enjoyed bruschettta, a pesto pizza with red and yellow peppers, red onions, and mushrooms, and then for dessert, tiramisu. The bruschetta was in honor of my best friend, Sara, who I always think of when I get bruschetta. And because he was not there to enjoy it for himself, I ate the tiramisu for my hubby. I'm pretty sure he is going to be super jealous when I tell him how awesome it was- simple yet delish!

And finally, it was warm! I wore bermudas and a tank top! Woo sunshine and warmth! Bring on the Vitamin D! I sure hope it sticks around for a while. For the record, today was the longest day of the year. Here, the sun light lasted for 16 hours and 50 minutes.

Oh, and by the way, this time next week, Georgie will finally be fixed!

Thursday and Friday

I have been busy busy busy these last two days.

Yesterday, I went to tea and scones with two new friends, Elizabeth and Heather. We went to my favorite Mildenhall High Town tea room- Emily's Tea Room. Super yummy scones with clotted cream and jam, a lovely pot of Darjeeling Tea, and fantastic company! Here is a quick snapshot of our tea time:

Thursday evening I attended a squadron Spouse's Coffee and had a wonderful time with my fellow squadron wives. We ate wonderful Paul Dean recipes including cornbread salad, a tortellini pasta salad, and some sort of rice and chicken (?) salad followed by desserts including a homemade strawberry pie and tangerine cake which was absolutely delectable!  We each, also, had the choice of a manicure or pedicure (Squee! I love said girlie indulgences <3 ) and now my finger nails looks fabulous! Or at least they will until I break one of them... It was wonderful to spend time and get to know and share stories with these strong and beautiful women who can answer pretty much any question I throw at them. I am so lucky to have such a great network here.

Today, after working out, I went back to Emily's Tea Room to finally meet an AF wife I have been friends with since August of last year. I had sooo much fun! She is sweet as can be, and it was so easy to talk to her. I think it has something to do with both of us being from small towns in the southeast who appreciate both sweet tea and tea the "English" way.

I am so excited to be coming out of my shell and making new friends! It was just too hard to be shy and hole up in my house with the cat. I need human interaction, and I'm finally getting out there. It was once unheard of for me to talk to three new people in one week let alone go out and have tea with them. And to make today even sweeter, I got a surprise skype with the hubs during his extended lunch break AND found out that I will get to see him a whole day sooner than originally planned!!! Yes, I was emotional mess and began sobbing when he told me. Tomorrow's plans? Maybe some local venturing, maybe berry picking... we'll see!

Mmmm....yoga

Have I ever mentioned that I love yoga?

Something about the different poses pulling on muscles I never knew existed leaves me feeling all warm and fuzzy feeling inside... or maybe that is all the energy I'm burning trying to balance myself on one foot while the other leg is twisted around it nd both arms are intertwined while lifting 10 extra pounds.

But seriously, I love going to the yoga classes on base. After working out earlier in the day, it's the perfect way to adequately stretch and relax my exhausted muscles. My favorite poses are usually the ones termed "more advanced" where you have to bend that bit back to tuck that bit there while twisting the other half of your body in the opposite direction.

Why else do I love it? Tonight, I got to do headstands. I haven't done a headstand in years, and I'm pretty sure I was one of maybe 3 people in the entire class, 4 if you include the instructor.

If I could become a yoga instructor, I think I could definitely be happy going to work every single day for hours. Super comfy clothes, no shoes allowed, relaxing and mellow music all combined with contorting my body and stretching my muscles.... sounds like pure heaven.

My Weekend

I miss lazy weekends, cooking breakfast with my husband and exploring England...

This weekend has been rather lonely. I worked out both days and set a new running record of 2 miles. Yesterday I went to the nearby base with the furniture store and bought a new mirror

George likes to play with the cat in the mirror and has left a few paw prints on it already.

I plan on going to church in about an hour and then skyping afterwards with on of my best girl friends in Ky and hopefully the hubs.

I really need more interaction with people...

Friday, Friday, and moooore Friday

 My Friday began at 135am GMT. I was rudely awaken by an intense migraine/tension headache and alternating cold chills and heat flashes. I took ibuprofen which seemed to help but a smidgen. I tried covers on and off; just sheet, sheet plus comforter; tshirt and shorts, just a tshirt. I gave up at 4am and resumed my NCIS marathon with Season 2 and a cup of fully caffeinated tea. The tea seemed to help clear the head but I definitely never went back to sleep.

From 830am to 230pm, I attended an Air Force Heartlink which helps spouses learn the ins and outs of Air Force life, how to cope with certain situations, and how to go about getting military related things accomplished. A lot of the information was wonderful and informative and helped to clear some murky issues up. However, there was SSSSSSSOOOOOOOO much info, I felt ridiculously overwhelmed and pressured into memorizing it all; not just for future reference, but to bring up with Gerrit and discuss how to handle certain situations and procedures. I feel like the information may have been better presented in smaller chunks according to corresponding topics/information rather than lumping it and cramming it all together.Still, it did help plus I got a spouses's coin which is pretty darn neat. And I met a two more wives, around my age, with college degrees, sans jobs and children. It's always great to meet new people!

By thte time I got home, I'd been up for 12+ hours. I resumed my marathon and dozed for about half an hour before I got my act together to go buy groceries. I took advantage of one of my favorite "Wife Privileges" and stole one of Gerrit's tshirts that was too small and went shopping. When I got done, I looked like some sort of weird health nut. Why??? Contents of my cart: milk, eggs, yogurt, berries, lowfat/high fiber granola bars, fresh and frozen veggies, spinach leaves and tortillas and beverages including vitamin enriched Snapple* Teas and Fuze juices, lo-cal Gatorade, and low-sodium V8. I maintain the statement that I am no nut, I have other "real" food at home, and I am just really conscious of my what I eat from day to day. However, said food consciousness in the past 4 weeks (along with regular exercise) has decreased my pant size by a whole size! Woo!

George helped me put away groceries and supervised my dish washing, much as I supervise Gerrit. He gave plenty of "You need more soap," "You missed a spot," and "Why didn't I get to lick that bowl first?" looks in the process. It's still just now 8pm, and I am bound and determined to talk to Gerrit on Skype this evening before I go to bed.

24 more days

So 24 more days til the hubs comes home. At least time is passing by more quickly than it did those first 2 days.

Yesterday was spent working out, yoga-ing, skyping with Gerrit and bf, Sara, cleaning, and watching NCIS.

Just lemme say, I love NCIS. Always have and believe I always will. Just something about that Gibbs... maybe Gerrit's hair will turn gray and then he can wear it Gibb's style high'n'tight... hahaha. Seriously, just kidding. Gerrit would look really strange. Not only do I enjoy watching it, but it's great to listen to. You never realize how used to sound you are until you spend a lot of time alone in your house with no cable or anything. I supposed I could turn on music but my brain needs a little more to process. PLus, if I'm listening to music, I feel compelled to sing along with everything and considering I have to leave windows open, I don't think the neighbors would appreciate it too much.

Today has been uneventful so far- working out and skyped with Gerrit. He passed his test yesterday- woot! Good luck to him on his tests today and tomorrow! It's great to realize that it's Thursday- as in the day before Friday which is the last day of week #1! Seriously, I only have to do this 3 more times. I am so sick of being apart from Gerrit at this point. And I'm sure when it gets here, I will be counting down the hours and minutes til I actually get to tackle him.

Tomorrow I am foregoing  working out- shocking! I know- to attend a Heartlink on base. This is a program to help new spouses become acquainted with the Air Force and the life style that accompanies it. More details about that tomorrow! And hopefully tomorrow evening won't be spent on the couch watching NCIS. Who wants to spend a Friday night at home alone???

26 more days...

I actually slept last night which was great. I'm kinda tired of having to cage George every morning at 430 though. Mr Energy decides to run laps upstairs and chase little invisible things around the extra room and the hall, and he keeps waking me up! He also took a nice chunk out of my thumb this morning with one of his claws. Sure does make it hard to wash my hair and my face... the little terd.

I talked to the hubs again this morning :) which I'm always happy about. It's kind of frustrating though- I get overwhelmed with being happy to talk to him but missing him horribly at the same time, and I lose all ability to generate almost any sort of decent conversation. Have I mentioned I cannot wait to see him??

Today is semi-productive. Along with working out, I unloaded the dish washer and am on #3 load of laundry in the washer with one load left. AND It is already 5pm! Woo! Love it when time goes by without you noticing.

I love my friends. Today, my friend Leslie brought me her NCIS dvd's. We don't have cable, and I feel like I have watched all of our dvds a bazillion times. And anyone who knows me, knows I can watch hours upon hours upon hours of NCIS. And hopefully today, I will get to talk to one of my best friends back in Kentucky and maybe a second if she finds time around her busy schedule. I love me some skyping with my Ky Girls :)

Oh, and for the first time in my life, I ran 1.5 miles!!!

Day 3

It is Day 3 of 30. So I just have to do this 10 more times!  Yes, I sort of have issues with numbers and math... you should listen to my brain while I run, calculating distances and such....

I went to the contemporary service last night and I liked it better than the traditional service so I will probably hit it up again next week. Though, I may go to both again since it may have just been an off day. We'll see. I always look for anything to get me out of the house.

Skyped with Gerrit this morning and found out he had a great day yesterday with his family. It was a bit short, again... but its definitely better than nothing.

Still didn't sleep much last night and could not, almost did not get out of bed this morning. My only motivation with letting George out of his carrier (yes, he was a bad boy and got a time-out at 5am this morning) and getting him food.

I worked out this afternoon, more running, eliptical and free weights. There is a Yoga/Pilates class in about 45 minutes so I thought I would give it a try. Once again, just trying to get out of this house.

I miss cooking dinner. I miss cooking not just to cook, but cooking for Gerrit. I hate eating dinner alone. I used to do it all of the time in college and it didn't bother me. Now, I crave company during dinner. It's just depressing eating a sandwich on the couch with only Georgie for company.

I have finished my book and must now find something else to do this evening...

28 more days...

So far today is much better than yesterday.

Last night was horrible though. I tossed and turned and tossed and turned. I was hot and then cool and then really hot. My pillow was all wrong. The mattress felt weird. My house makes scary noises like someone is trying to break in and get me. And I was all alone. I did not sleep until after 2am and then woke up at 830am. I was afraid of going back to sleep so I just got up and got ready to go to church.

Today was the first time I have been to the Sunday morning service at the chapel on base. It was kind of sad for me because I didn't feel connected like I do at FBC BG. Maybe it is my church family back home or maybe it's the fact that no one can compare to Dr Mark Hopper and his Sunday morning messages. I never managed to make it when I was home- so much running around, getting caught up, being jet lagged, or trying to spend some last minute time with family always seemed to prevail and I feel awful for it. It felt right to get up and go this morning, but I don't know if it will become my regular church here. I am trying out the contemporary service this evening, and I may have to explore and seek out local churches. I've never attended a sermon that was given with a British accent...

I have already spoken to the hubs this morning on skype. He is alive and in one piece, thankfully. I really worry to much... He is spending the day with family that lives nearby, and I know they will be so excited to see him.

Day #2 is halfway over.

Back in England

So I am back in England but now my husband is on his way to Florida...

I had the longest trip EVER coming home, or at least is seemed like it. The AirCanada check-in desk in Nashville doesn't open until 2 hours before the plane leaves. I sat there for an hour and a half, just waiting to check my bags. Flight to Toronto was delayed in boarding and taking off because of lightning storms. Then, we were stuck flying above Toronto for half an hour because of bad weather on the ground. Therefore, I ran from my arrival gate to the gate for LHR AirCanda gate and made it for the start of boarding. I get on the plane, and yes, I have an aisle seat and yes, the person next to me wasn't bigger than I am so I didn't have to "share" my seat. However, right as we take off, my little tv screen froze - for at least an hour if not longer...Thankfully the flight attendant just hit a reset button otherwise I would have been going crazy for 8 and something hours- if you didn't know, I don't usually sleep in air planes, not because I don't want to, but because I can't. I was hoping the last of my troubles had ended- nope! The customs guy gave me a hard time, not about my Visa, but for the fact that I had unemployed written under occupation on the landing card. Even when I informed him of my impending job search and becoming employed he still gave me the stink eye. Ugh.. and if things weren't already frustrating, I was sick from flying and sleep-deprived. THEN I got to Baggage Claim. Guess whose bag was still in Toronto?! Yours truly's. The only thing that made that entire ordeal worth it was seeing my husband standing  there with open arms just outside of the baggage area.

I finally felt whole again. Like something was slightly off since April and then just clicked back into place Thursday morning. I didn't even care about the 3 hour trip back to base. I enjoyed every minute on the tube and every minute in the car with Gerrit. I guess after being apart for 6 weeks, you'll take just about whatever you can get, whether that is a romantic candlelight dinner or a 3 hour trip by tube and car- I got the latter and loved it. I have spent almost every single minute back with Gerrit- the exceptions: when we each took a shower, when he weed-eated our yard (not big enough to justify buying a mower) though I watched out the window with George, and then when he had to walk outside to his car to get things to pack for Florida. I am so thankful that he took yesterday off of work to spend time with me. I would have been going crazy here at the house had he not.

At 5am this morning, I went left at the roundabout while my husband's bus went straight. I won't see him again until July 4. I'm already a basketcase. I fully intended to go running when I got back to the house. Instead, I found myself crawling into my bed, phone and car keys, still in hand, and cried myself to sleep. The only person in my bed when I woke up at 10 am was me, though George was on the bed, too. And yet again, I am back to feeling off, like something vital is missing, leaving a big aching whole in my chest.

And here is a little irony for you: A year ago today, I watched my husband graduate from BMT.

Please get here soon, July 4.